My Scrupulous End

I will not live to see tomorrow.
that much is given, factual and plain,
I contemplate how it will feel as i walk to the edge,
and crave that i could rewind just once more again.

I will not live to see tomorrow.
I’ve played out 20 years since I learnt my fate,
life is transient and that is our truth,
I’ve come to my peace with no desire to wait.

I will not live to see tomorrow.
I wrote to my brother as witness and friend,
I pray the errand is thorough and complete,
a signed agreement; my scrupulous end.

I will not live to see tomorrow.
so I shall gorge on this food and devour this drink,
I’ll scrub myself clean, step into my final dress,
and they’ll inject me so I can no longer think.

I was executed.

I paid for my crime with my life and breath.
I had remorse and a heap of shame.
and prayed while rowing the river of death.

DV

Inspiration

Donald Grant was the first man to be executed in 2022. He was sentenced to death as a result of murdering two hotel employees during a robbery in 2001. His time on death row ended on Thursday January 27th at 10.16am where he was given a lethal injection at Oklahoma State Penitentiary. This poem is not a commentary on whether he should or should not have received the penalty or a question on the morality of capital punishment itself, rather it is an attempt at gaining an insight into someone who knows they on the brink of being executed. I wrote this from the perspective of Grant during his final 24 hours as he faced his finality and thought about his past mistakes, his present situation and an uncertain future in whatever afterlife he may meet.

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